Offering: Naan King Doner
Establishment: Kebab Mahal, Edinburgh
Date and time: 31st December 2016, 15:02
Price: £5.99
Seating: Around 20 seats and 6 tables, often a waiting time.
Like Lazeez, Kebab Mahal is one of those places that has been around for decades, it looks basic from the outside and but you can tell how well loved it is by the hustle and bustle of the passing and repeat custom it receives. Often, people who enter the doors know the owner by name and this is usually a good indication that if the place was not here, it would be sorely missed. Also like Lazeez, the interior of this place is so understated that many people would never give it a second thought or would be put off by the lack of sophistication - those people probably eat entire pizzas with a knife and fork. The awards on display at the far wall are a telling sign; this place spends it's money on the food rather the decor.
I had to stop coming here for a while. Not because I wasn't a fan of the food - au contraire; the owner and his son knew exactly what I wanted every time I walked through that old-fashioned door: the Naan King Doner (that's what I like to call it, it really rolls off the tongue). I felt slight embarrassment that I had become so predictable and that I had been coming so frequently, I decided I would not have a doner from Kebab Mahal for a good six or so months. On the tail end of the year, I returned only to be greeted by the bearded owner with my order known in advance and told to me before I had uttered a word, almost as if the owner was looking at a clock and spoke the time - I couldn't escape it - they knew everything; the extra chilli, the extra onions, the slight splash of yogurt sauce! It would take much longer than only six months before they would ever forget my order. I really don't know whether this would be impressive if I was to attend to a kebab with company; would my friends be impressed? more than likely, they would joke that I was too deeply entrenched in the doner underworld and that there was now no turning back.
As I sat down on one of the round tables, I asked the garcon for his finest, most delectable of table waters to which he assisted in large jug accompanied by a small glass tumbler. The service was, as usual quite speedy, the fresh naan arrived with a chunky topping of doner meat and a sparse yet simple salad consisting of all the usual suspects but with an added yet often overlooked compadre - white cabbage. Often enough, red cabbage is the desired accompaniment of the cabbage family, however in this particular establishment white cabbage seems to be considered amongst the penultimate items that deliver a higher state of doner consciousness. I don't completely disagree. I do however prefer red cabbage. Red cabbage feels like it can be overloaded in a kebab and it would not usually ruin it however, I've found that when the same happens with its white counterpart, it can feel far too crowded a kebab and must be shredded to thinner pieces. Another seriously enjoyable aspect of the red cabbage is the fact that it often comes soaked in a pickle vinegary liquid, similar to the jalapenos juice - a very desirable liquid indeed but this liquid, this liquid is not here as we have fresh white cabbage. Instead, the entire salad is soaked in a zingy lemon dressing, it really brings a captivating succulence to the entire experience.
...when the chilli sauces are having their way for you, make room for the captivating yogurt supremo!
The lady in red, lumpy and thick with it's chunks and probably slightly dry when compared to its sistren sauces; it contains a burn comparable to that of Original Best Kebab House. There is a sister in red too; a sweeter, runnier affair. Whist the lady is quite an intense vinegar heavy condiment, the sister is way less dominant and lets her sibling take over as the main attraction.
And when it all becomes too much, when the chilli sauces are having their way for you, make room for the captivating yogurt supremo! Your stimulated taste buds will be cooled by it's creamy, runny coriander touch.
The doner meat has been cut medium to thin, think about as thick as Marmaris but not as wide cuts. This meat also extremely heavy, settles in your stomach like the meat of a burger and I'm certain that it is entirely beef, this is also ensured by the texture that tastes much more dense rather than the floatier, lighter taste of lamb. The meat has been seasoned to a medium spiciness but with the added density of the beef, the spiciness appears to be amplified.
The naan bread was fresh, warm and thick. It had all the delightful air bubbles that give it a wispy, soft texture. A grand companion to it's splendid content.
As I finish polishing off this fine feast, I look to the wall to my right and tell myself the same thing I do every time I come here after looking at the numerous awards indicated: I must one day get a curry here and one day I will but until the very charming owner forgets my order upon entry, I feel I really can't challenge the man.
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